testimony

I’ve been a lifelong believer of God who naively went down a spiritual-seeking rabbit hole, and “social media kool-aid” drinking episode that led me to the deception and grips of the enemy. I experienced devastation because of this. I grew up in a lineage of people abused by dogmatic Christianity, so never in my wildest dreams did I imagine that Jesus Christ himself would show up as the warrior who saved my soul in my darkest hour of facing death and excruciating grief in 2016. After experiencing this life-changing event in the seclusion of coastal redwoods, I had to come to terms with the fact that I just had one of those “born again” moments that I used to associate with abusive religious people in my southern upbringing who stood on pedestals pointing their finger and yelling, “repent or you’ll burn in hell!”

Through my firsthand experience of God’s presence, I unlearned the lies of how dogma weaponized God to keep me flinching away from knowing the true Christ, and I was embraced over and over again in unconditional love and mercy so pure that it rewired my understanding into knowing the truth of God’s grace. I was completely transformed.

I did not grow up in the church so my journey of discovering and growing with Christ had a backwoods John the Baptist flavor. It all began when I lived in a studio in the redwoods that was two-hours away from any big box store with no cell service. I had a burner plate and toaster oven as my kitchen and an outdoor shower. My studio was in a literal fairy forest that a little girl had created, evidenced by the “unicorn crossing” signs and glitter. It was here that I lived as a pixie monk, and Jesus transformed my life, strengthened my character and taught me the intricacies of spiritual warfare. I lived a very simple life in constant prayer, a lot of unintentional fasting and honest jobs such as walking dogs, gardening, housekeeping, organizing closets, innkeeping and working at the local bookstore. With Christ, I healed from the inside out. Together, God and I healed my own trauma and also the trauma I carried for my bloodline of generational wounds and curses.

Through my perseverance in faith over several trialing years, Jesus turned me into a victorious prayer warrior. I'm a survivor of narcissistic abuse, stalking, bullying, social rejection, depression, shame, low self-worth, psychic attack, and emotional, verbal & sexual abuse. I wondered why I struggled for so many years healing these things and God brought me to the moment that the cycle of trauma all began. At the foundation of all the other trauma—I am a survivor of child molestation.

At the end of my intense character-building season in the wilderness, God helped me fight evil for the return of the innocence stolen from me when I was five. The redemptive gavel finally hit in the courts of heaven and the 28-year cycle of trauma ended for me, my ancestors, and the generations to come forth through me. I was finally free of it all!

I am resilient proof of Christ’s capacity to heal, restore and be victorious over the enemy because that is how much God loves us and will fight for us. It’s a profound strength, grace and mercy greater than anything we could ever imagine. Hallelujah!

I have seen, experienced, felt deepest agony and defeated evil spirits I pray no one else ever has to. I pray that I “took one for the team” and that my wisdom and victories will now serve and guide others to greater freedom in truth.

I’m non-proselytizing, anti-dogma and interfaith in my embrace, love and acceptance of each person’s encounters and relationship with God in their own unique expression, lineage, language and path. I support what is pure, true and real. I understand that each person has their own story and experience around what that is for them personally. The only path I don’t support is the worship of evil.

Thank you for witnessing my testimony.